Room 755: Bridal Expo

I'm not making this up. I went this past Saturday at the LA Convention Center. Now before you start congratulating me, just know that I did not have the little "Bride" sticker with the heart on it. I did my good friend duty and went with Krista who is getting married (We think...the ring has not yet materialized. Yes, I know but I'm taking her word for it). And to be honest, I was curious as hell. And she sold me with the "cake tasting" angle (Free Food! Poor Man's Mentality shows up again!). So besides the huge room of various DJ, flower, photog vendors, there was a cheesy fashion show (Where I assume old America's Next Top Model girls go when the show is over) as well as the Embarass the Poor Saps That Were Forced to Come Here With Their Fiance (Yes, they made three of these dudes get up on the catwalk and dance to the cackles and whistles of the ladies...I bowed my head in shame). Thankfully (I guess) all of that didn't last long because Susie Hanson's Salsa Band was setting up for another set and we left. (Another thankfully: Krista was not into all that tacky stuff. She had an agenda and some taste.) And the third thankfully? We were there on Saturday so we would miss the Sunday "Cake Dive". I'm so glad you asked. The Cake Dive is a contest where 5 lucky ladies are chosen to dig through a wedding cake for a $5000 prize (the rumor was that it was jewelry and I don't really wear jewelry and also I would want to eat the cake so...) No Cake Dive, alas. So I spent the day following Krista around and minding the brouchure bag. And also, marvelling A) the big business that is weddings and B) the big business that is cheap looking, tacky weddings. But hey, she bought me lunch (PMM is now a registered trademark)!

Amenities of Room 755: Room decor by The Veil Lady. Your initials in lights on the floor. Dried bridal bouquets adorning the window. Directions to the Elopement Room.

Room 1425: She's Crafty!

Decoupage. That's right, I said it! I bought two plant stands at TJ Maxx a few years ago and I decoupaged the shit out of them! Well, just the tops really. I have mad love for cutting pics out of magazines and making collages. I find it very soothing, weirdly enough. The scissors and glue of it all. I guess I didn't spend enough time in Kindergarten. Anyway, I took these plant stands and pasted down some pictures from travel magazines. SLAM! New furniture! I hope I can stop myself...
Crafts are such a weird beast. You can't force crafts on people. My mom and I tried to teach crafts to kids at church a few times and boy, they weren't havin' it. One actually tried to throw me off the second story of the church. (That's a long story...needless to say, I'm not fond of anyone named Antoinette.) You have to find your own crafts. Because as much as I like pretty paper and can wander for hours in a stationary store/office supply store, I can't imagine me ever scrapbooking. The thought of it makes my skin crawl. I associate scrapbooking with holiday themed sweaters. And I hate, hate, hate the "thought balloon" stickers that they sell to put on your snapshots for "hilarity". I never ever thought the phrase "Party on, dude!" in my head and certainly not when that picture was taken, so why are you making me out to look like an ass? Sorry folks. Apparently these things make me angry. Where are my scissors?

Amenities of Room 1425: Collage Wallpaper curtesy of Budget Travel and Entertainment Weekly. Scattered Glue Peelings. This is a No Thought Balloon Room.